because, i thought...why being so blinded by things that we cant even reached when the one right infront of us is there waiting.
why am i running for someone who dont even want me when youre there, saying you misses me every single day since youre in camp.
and why cant i have you back when i can have you.
and i finally realise.
thats why i made up my mind, cause..even that is what he wants. me being with you back, despite he knows im falling head over heels for him. ive really think it thru for the pass few days, and finally, haidah agreed with me, so as syah. haidah totally agreed with me and that makes me more confident to be with you back. and im prepared and im not feeling remorse about it either.


but sadly...you didnt get to hear my explanation as well as my answer, cause you didnt want to know about it nor hear. im not sure why, but thats what you want. you told me to forget about the questions yesterday. i bet you cant read this because, tmr morning you gonna book in and i bet you will not gonna be back out here for the next 2 or 3 months. i just wanna post this, because i might never know your sister might be reading this or your friends might.

i really want to scream deep inside me, out to the ocean and up to the sky that i miss you as hell.
i really do.
i miss your stupid dry humour.
i miss you breaking pills for me when im sick.
i miss you making silly things funny.
i miss you saying out beautiful lyrics showing me how much you love me.
i miss messing up your hair.
i miss when you sleep on my lap.
i miss chatting with you in msn.
i guess youre the only one who really understands me.
i truly misses you as much as you misses me.
i guess, first love isnt the easiest to forget.

i know you wont be reading this, and thats the most saddest part ever.
i just want to tell
you this: